What i learned from turning 30

Hey my lucky people.  I know you must be saying to yourself.  "He is back, come on honey go get the kids.  Let's all sit around and read some of the crap that Shel has is store for us today". If that is not what you are thinking that means you don't have kids.  Just take out that part and that is exactly what you were thinking........maybe not.  Anyhow(sorry for the incoherent babbling of an intro) so i am back.  The delay was I was busy as Sarah Palin's interview writer over the last couple of weeks.  After the katie couric interview they gave me the axe because they said that i made her sound too smart. So here i am back at blogging.  btw it was a pretty sweet deal.  I was the one that told her to say that she could wake up and see Putin when he is mowing his lawn.  See now ya'll can't stop talking about it.   

Ok......so for those who don't know i just turned 30.  As i approached the day I had some worries.  You know you hear stories about guys that turn 30 and then whamooooo! they lose there sense of style.  I have seen it first hand. You end up leaving the house and come to church in sweat pants church socks penny loafers a polo shirt and a members only jacket. (We R Perswaded, minus a guy whose name should remain secret due to the nature of these blogs.  but his name rhymes with Stobert Pennedy, am I lying?)  At 30 you are supposed to see that first rogue gray hair show up.  That first click in your back arrives when you are doing certain exercises!(I really wanted to make that joke, but why it is too easy there).  Needless to say, I was fearful of 30, although i didn't tell anyone.

But 30 is here....I don't feel much different.  I did have the momentary feeling to wear

a pair of argyle socks and a jacket with the suade elbows. A pair of mustard pants and a full paisley shirt. But i think that was just the bad sandwich that i ate the night before.  Or temporary insanity.  I will never see a gray hair as long as Dark and lovely exist(i am pretty sure that there is a man's version but i am so lazy that i don't even want to search CVS website...Wait is that a sign of 30s...wait i was lazy before. forget the panic) The click in my back......I man drink strong back soup!! I man no get click ina fi him bak.  I man wikid pon di dance floor. I man...(ok enough you are getting corny now...NOW? This entire is!)

The one thing 30 has taught me.  I am no longer 29 and falling on your face while skating still hurts just as bad now as it did then.  30 means my insurance goes down another percent.  30 means I am one step closer to begging for Split Pea soup for friday dinner.  Honestly(actually no joke right now), 30 means i have had 30 years of happiness and look forward to more.

(MAN that was tough)Anyhow, i just got a call from McCain's people, they are asking me if I can comeback and train Palin for the upcoming debate. I will have to check my schedule.  This week i am supposed to teach G Dubya contractions.  

Respek,

Di Yard Man